The Desperation Is Tangible: Even Unique Whips Can't Sell Off Their Big Rigs

I can’t credibly make fun of Unique Whips as I’ve never really been able to sit through an entire episode—I couldn’t even wait long enough to see how Tony Stewart’s hearse turned out—but from what I hear, it’s a pretty godawful show, and both Rob and Sean think the guy who hosts it is kind of a tool. That being said, I can’t help feeling sorry for this Unique Whips Escalade, which can’t get a bid on eBay to save its kitted-up life. The seller’s verbiage clearly indicates that they’re completely fed up with this ride: "This listing is the last listing for this vehicle on Ebay." Or else what? They send it to the crusher? Given the poor sales prospects for similar gas-guzzlers, such a fate may not be far off. The ad continues, "Owner must sell this vehicle immediately and that is reflected in what was already a bargain price. It is being reluctantly sold at an insanely low price, almost what a stock one goes for." They might as well be saying "Look—just buy this ridiculous goddamn thing already. Our commission is dwindling away with each time we have to re-list it, okay?" The "Buy It Now" price is set at a darn near humiliating $44,500. But with less than a day left on the auction, it seems unlikely that anyone will buy it now. Or ever.