This Just In: New On The Net

I had to put some Ikea furniture together last night, and because all my tools are out in Lynnwood with my parts car, I was stuck using the crappy disposable wrench that came with the couch. How humiliating. Here’s the news!

• Cops in Connecticut were looking for some guy in connection with a series of traffic accidents. But they didn’t have to wait long before he crashed his truck into their police station’s garage. Associated Press.
• Fellow Indy drivers are sniveling that Danica Patrick is too aggressive on the track, because they feel that, as a girl, she’s supposed to let others push her around. You can probably imagine what Patrick has to say about that. NBC Sports.
• Some dental-office staffers in Arlington, WA, decided to beat gas prices by saddling up and riding their horses in to work. Associated Press.
• Those economists are at it again! The latest media-spotlight-seeking egghead is claiming that $7/gal gas will push 10 million poor people’s vehicles off US roads in the next four years. Guess there’ll be a lot more parking spaces for economists. Freep.
• Boss Hog’s ‘76 Cadillac Eldorado from the 2004 Dukes of Hazzard movie is up for sale on eBay. Carscoop.