Ever heard of a Great Wall Coolbear? That’s their weird and delightfully Engrish name for a fake Scion xB from China. And the Dongfeng EQ2050, below, is proabably about as burly as a toilet-paper roll. MonsterAuto has published a rundown of the six most hilarious Chinese bootlegs, along with a video explaining how the cheap imitations pose a real threat to the automotive marketplace (don’t miss the video of the Chery crash test, during which "the dummy became so entwined with the wreckage of the car that he had to be removed piece by piece"). Apparently the Germans are pretty angry about the blatant BMW and smart car plagiarism, and are talking about bringing copyright infringment charges against Chinese automakers. But the Russians are stoked, and are even volunteering to be the test market for China’s new generation of tin-can knock-offs. Lucky them!

The US isn’t the only place where unsaleable vehicles are collecting dust on dealer lots. In the wake of a perfect storm of environmental and economic disturbances, the ambitous goals Chinese car dealerships have set for themselves are falling flat. Market analysts blame a combination of the massive snowstorms early in the year, the Sichuan earthquake, a flagging stock market, high gas prices, and growing tight-fistedness on the part of lenders—and they predict a slew of dealership closings in China by the end of 2008. Sucks to be them. But hey, does this mean there’ll be some oil left for the world after all?

Following the terrible earthquake that devastated the Sichuan province of China this month, this crushed Citroen C-Triomphe was back on the road, running and driving. I imagine the handling is pretty jacked, and it’s definitely going to be having some right-rear tire wear issues in a hurry—but for now, hey, it’s transportation.

Source: China Car Times via CarScoop

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While we’ve been accused of Western propaganda for airing the mind-numbing crash tests of China’s car manufacturers, we generally feel that these videos speak for themselves. And when I came across this disastrous crash-test video mislabled as a made-in-China vehicle, I was more than willing to give the original poster the benefit of the doubt: the truck crashes exactly like all of the other Chinese vehicles we’ve featured on the site. But it turns out that China isn’t the only nation capable of manufacturing a vehicle that turns itself inside out upon impact: the truck is acutally a VW! Click here for footage German engineering at its finest. Thanks for the catch, valek and Toshi.

Now, I’m not really meaning to compare Buick to David Hasselhoff. I’m sure the Lucerne has a lovely singing voice, and could eat a hamburger without requiring a car wash afterward. But given the aging demo the marque tends to attract here in the States, I have wondered why the company hasn’t been put out to pasture, like Oldsmobile. One of the big reasons could be that the Buick brand is increasingly associated with young people in China, and unless you’ve been living under a rock for the past few years, you know the domestic market there has huge potential for American companies. For more info, check out this video the General just posted from the Beijing Motor Show.