By Jen Dunnaway

Editor

I hate trees. I’m not an anti-environmentalist maniac or a climate-change-denier or anything like that–trees have a place, and that place is out in the forest, far from anywhere that cars might wish to park or drive. But trees in urban areas? In mall parking lots? On “tree-lined streets”? Ugh. They were clearly put there by people who don’t give a crap about cars.

In addition to the more obvious and brutal ways in which trees win–as in, for example, when you collide with one, or when a storm tips one over onto your ride–the true insidiousness of their evil lies in their secretions. My least favorite kind of tree are those scrawny little sap-dripping deals that landscape designers seem intent on planting anywhere that large numbers of cars tend to congregate. Why are these trees installed in business parks and mall parking lots? They provide little or no shade, no sound deadening or privacy, and they’re sure as hell not scenic. They seem to exist primarily as full-time misting-machines for tree sap. How is this appealing, how does it benefit anyone? It’s like planting something that exists solely to dispense bird droppings–which trees, on occasion, do as well. Read more…

Photo from Bruce’s ride page.

Continue reading "Trees Always Win" »

By Jen Dunnaway

Editor

For me, it’s the fear of another driver senselessly jackrabbitting out of a side-street into my path. In the last two weeks, I’ve had to lock up the wheels and lean on the horn on multiple occasions to thwart some fool intent on getting T-boned when I had the right of way. I’m not sure why someone would so desperately want to put their fragile driver’s door in the path of an oncoming steel bumper–maybe they just figure they did their part by stopping at the stop sign, and what’s everyone so upset about? Whatever the reason, it seems this disturbing trend in bonehead driving is on the rise, and it’s made me pretty paranoid about intersections.

How about you? What bonehead drivers’ habits do you fear will one day be the death of your ride?

By Katherine Helmetag

Atomicalex

The IIHS is back at it again with the 55mph crap. This time, it’s in response to their own report that (no kidding) small cars fare poorly in collisions with larger cars. Those darn laws of physics! Apparently, if we drive slower, we will have less momentum when we crash into each other, and the smaller cars will not be squished as much. That’s great, but what’s the likelihood of getting hit on the highway, anyway? NHTSA data show that far more fatalities occur on roads with speed limits lower than 50mph, so why not focus on improving safety on those roads instead?  Politicians will no doubt jump at this opportunity to fund local police precints, but I say: keep your greedy mitts off my 70mph speed limits!

On Monday David wrote about how much he liked Mitsubishi’s Twin Clutch-Sportronic Shift Transmission. And MSN recently published an article called "The End of Manual Labor?" Obviously, automatic transmissions are getting more sophisticated. And the manual tranny is definitely slipping in popularity. From the MSN article:

Back in 1980, more than 35 percent of all cars were sold with a stick. Because they cost less and boosted fuel mileage, manuals were more popular when gas prices went up or the economy went down, according to Mike Omotoso, powertrain analyst for J.D. Power and Associates. Then the SUV appeared, which often came automatic-only. By 2005 only 6 percent of all buyers bothered with a stick. Skyrocketing fuel prices and more choices in small cars brought a mild uptick to 7.7 percent last year, but the trend is clear.

These days, automatic transmissions can post faster acceleration times, and they often get better mileage and have lower emissions. But here’s the thing: manual trannies are still cheaper, more durable, and more fun. Continue reading…

Continue reading "The End of Manual Labor?" »

It’s always one of those pro/con situations, whether to replace an entire half-shaft or "just" swap on a new CV boot. What if there’s just a hairline crack in your original boot, you’ve hardly lost any grease, and you know the joint is still good? To me it seems wasteful to replace the entire shaft when all you need is a boot. At the last shop I worked in, we had one of those lovely spreaders that’d quite nearly ploink a replacement CV boot on for you. But my former shop is an entire continent away now, so I decided to try out one of the joe-shmoe semi-universal boots. More…

Continue reading "Had Much Luck With "Kwik Boots"? I Sure Haven't…" »

Over the past week I’ve been selling a bunch of items here and there to try and make a little loot. One such item is my old BMW M5. You see, it was getting up there in age, performance was still everything it ever was, but since I just started my business MR. ANGRY INC. and needed the capital, it had to go. I checked all the other prices on used M5’s on the net and then low-balled all of them by three grand. By doing this I sold in the car in about 40 minutes. A gentleman called, we struck a deal and POOF!! M5 is sold.

Now this is where is gets interesting. You see, after I posted that it was sold, I began receiving multiple emails from other M5 owners telling me how I was doing "them" a disservice by selling my car under the normal value, and that by doing this I was actually dropping the values of their cars… WTF? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

These are e-mails from people I don’t know, and yet they feel the need to tell me how the sale of my car affects them–simply amazing. I sell my car, take the hit and the rest of the jackass peanut gallery out there decides I’m to blame for decline in prices of an eight year old German muscle car.

Ladies and gentleman, you frickin’ kill me. Now go out and there, do something productive and stop wasting my time with your BS comments. Schmucks…

Ever have one of those weeks where just about everything went wrong? Well, last week was my week for everything in my garage to turn to crap. Let’s start with Monday. It was a great day here in NYC and I decided to take my 2001 BMW M5 out for a little jaunt. Keep in mind that this car is no spring chicken. I say this because once you say BMW and M5 in the same sentence people get certain ideas in their heads, like you probably go to country clubs and buy expensive t- shirts and stuff. My old M5 has 91k miles on the clock and over the past six months has been beating me senseless with repairs. The newest issue seems to be a fun knocking noise coming from the driver’s side front end. I’ve heard everything from thrust arm bushings (no idea what those are), to the steering rack, to the struts. Either way I know it’s going to be expensive, because, well, M5 and cheap never follow each other. I brought the car into the mechanic only to find the sound had stopped. Typical, right? So, I picked the car up, drove thirty miles and the sound came back. Simply astounding…

Next up, my trusty old 1997 Mercury Villager, AKA, the "Danger VAN." This old girl is the work horse of the fleet with 117k miles. Now I know some of you out there will snicker at the fact that I drive a minivan as a daily driver, but ya’ll can go scratch because I LOVE this thing. I don’t worry about parking anywhere, I can haul parts in it and it only cost $2,500. Until now, that is. On Thursday I was driving through the Midtown tunnel into NYC, air conditioner blasting, radio on, when I looked down and saw the temp needle BURIED in the red. OH SH*T! Being in NYC and broken down is one thing, being stuck in the Midtown tunnel one hour before rush hour is something completely different. I limped the van out of the tunnel and right into a parking garage. It was pissing anti-freeze and smoking like an SOB. Crap, there goes car #2.

Fast forward to Saturday. I was heading to the CIA (Culinary Institute of America) in Hyde Park, NY in the Charger with some friends, when I went to get off an exit ramp and the power steering started whining like a stuck pig. I pulled off and checked the reservoir only to find it completely empty. Ah…the joys of old car ownership. Luckily I had a quart of power steering fluid with me and put it in only to watch it start to drip right out. Wonderful. Now keep in mind that the Charger is my ROCK. Yes, it’s old but this car has NEVER left me stranded. Now here I was 75 miles from home with a leaking power steering pump. Ugh… It did get me home, though.

So now I sit here typing this with my three cars all needing work. Four if you count the Daytona, but that’s a whole ‘nuther story. The Charger I can fix myself, so no worries there. The BMW, well, I have no idea how fix that strudel wagon. And the Danger Van, I may be lucky enough to get away with a thermostat, new belts and fan–unless of course the head gasket blew, then it just gets donated to charity. Either way, though, this was a rough week, and I know the bill is going to suck when all is said and done.

I don’t know, maybe I should sell everything and buy one good vehicle. Problem, there is nothing out that can do everything. So like I said earlier. UGH.

Continue reading "The Fleet is Down!" »

Seriously, what kind of psycho does this? I’ve written about leaving notes on people’s cars, but I’m talking about nice, friendly, one-gearhead-to-another notes intended to express how awesome the other person’s ride is. Anyone who sets out with a Sharpie, a bunch of cardboard, and a head full of self-righteous indignation with the intent of plastering unoffending cars with melodramatic messages to the "Police" deserves to be run over by the next Prius that comes whipping inaudibly around the corner. Last night, I saw that the Firebird I’ve been keeping an eye on got tagged by this rabid busybody (I stole their sign and photographed it before tossing it in the recycle). And today, Eric over in our ad sales department sent me some pics he snapped of this innocent green Escort, a neighborhood regular whose owner I’ve seen plenty of times, that had gotten similarly plastered with hysterical garbage—as well as an abandoned-car sticker. More…

Continue reading "Not In My Backyard: Suck-Up With Giant Cardboard Signs Terrorizes CarDomain Neighborhood" »

For the record, I don’t think they do, and when I bought the only new vehicle I’ve ever owned, it was canary yellow. But in spite of my pro-yellow stance, I still found the Yellow Cars Suck post on JediMonkeys way funny. Basically, the author took the first page of google results for "yellow car" and made snide comments about all the images, and it’s just as juvenile as it sounds. Check out the description of the photo below: "Some loon tied a monkey to this stupid yellow car, and even a monkey knows how dumb it is. Look at the monkey’s posture—he’s clearly trying to get off this pathetic excuse for a car." Now, I might have just huffed a little too much paint this morning, but that made me laugh. What do you think about yellow cars? More hater food over at JediMonkeys.

At around this time every NASCAR season, I go through a bit of withdrawal when the weekly Sprint Cup race broadcast switches over from Fox to some other network. It’s not that I really have any great love for Fox, but I do enjoy their NASCAR setup, and the announcers are the best. I love the cutaway car demos they do, I love that they actually give some airtime to the pit reporters. I love DW’s affable Southern charm and explosive mannerisms, and I even get a kick out of Jeff Hammond’s slightly unsettling bionic gaze. The easy rapport and conversational chemistry of this former driver/crew chief duo is unbeatable. What I’m not a fan of is TNT’s generic broadcast bots, who look like they’d be more at home narrating stock market activity on msnbc or something. Even with the addition to their team of sleepy and semi-retired driver Kyle Petty, who’s had a lot of experience watching racing from the back of the pack, they manage to miss all the important stuff during the race and carry on with the most completely insipid and generic banter. More…

Continue reading "TNT's Inset Ads: Even More Annoying Than Regular TV Commercials?" »